Stable - no pun intended!

So it's been awhile since I've posted. Many emotions later, I think I'm at a stable point now where I'm OK not owning a horse. I am riding Freckles, and Stacy and I are going to try out a temporary short-term lease. This past Saturday I went for a short ride with Stacy (on Sadie) and Cheryl (on Texas) just around Cheryl's property. Since Sadie and Frecks had not met Texas yet, they were both being yotches to him, kicking him and pinning ears. That set the stage for a nervous ride for me. It was bad. I wanted to get off - I think I just felt so out of control that I felt safer on the ground. I turned to Stace and Cheryl and said "Now I remember EXACTLY why I sold my horse." They convinced me to stay on, but I was DONE with the ride. I felt awful. I feel like all I ever do is ruin other people's rides. They both assured me that was NOT the case. They are true friends. Cheryl said "if we have to do this 3 times a week for the whole summer, then that's what we'll do!" That's what a true friend says to someone.

The following day I went and hung out with Frecks. Cheryl called me early in the day and told me I needed to come and hop on again, if even just for 5 minutes. I didn't want to, but later in the day I did. I didn't ride, because by the time I got over there Cheryl was doing homework and I didn't want to get on by myself yet. Dumb. But I brushed her - and mind you, I only ground tie her and she does fantastic! It takes so little to get her to do what I ask her to do, and that is wonderful! I just need to remember that when she's got dancy-prancy feet when I'm in the saddle! So, I walked her out around the road. At first she was nervous and snorty, but the second time I took her around, head was low, and she was paying attention to ME, not her surroundings. So I need to focus on that for now.

I'm glad I didn't buy her - well, she wasn't for sale anyway!! But if she would have been, I would have bought her. I'm glad I'm kind of on this break. It feels more and more like it's going to turn into a permanent "break" for me. And that's ok. It feels good to have that extra money every month. And, not to be so pressured into HAVING to go and do something with my horse. Who knows how it will turn out. If/when God puts that perfect horse in my lap, things will be different. But until that happens, and it's 100% clear that THAT is what I should be doing, I'm going to be happy and enjoy my current situation. Something I haven't done in a loooonnnnngggg time - ENJOY horses.